interview by: Nikita

After I put the fire out in my hair and picked my jaw back off the floor, my life had changed. The Evil Operating System (or TEOS) became my high water mark for classic “metal,” complete with clockwork precision and blinding fury. Even since the beginning of their career, this garden state New Jersey band’s signature sound has been the twin-guitar assault. Now, these guys are on the high road, playing gigs and festivals in the Mid-Atlantic region. They are fueled by being friends and are made invincible by their humor and their amazing stamina. Check these guys out!

Maelstom: This is a full band email interview and I feel like I am in the dark here looking for a way to see what you guys are about. Can you tell me what you are all wearing right now?

Eric (vocals): I’m wearing full body armor, night vision goggles, a Viking helmet and rollerblades.

Steve (drums): I’m wearing a space suit with a fish bowl type helmet with two silvery antennae sticking out of the top. Lateral and vertical motion can be achieved with micro-fusion reactor arrays attached to my footwear that can allow me to hover when in gravity, or to walk normally in zero gravity.

Clint (bass): I’m wearing an over shield and active camouflage.

Maelstrom: I misplaced the email where one of you said you were wearing your mother’s wedding dress because it made you feel pretty. That’s some cajones there, big metal guy – I like that. So, a band of jokers. Hey, it’s Friday night. When you don’t have a gig on the weekend what do you all like to do?

Clint: We hit the local rock spots to hang with the people in the scene and promote for the next gig (which is never too far away) and play Halo on the xBox. Halo is the band’s group obsession. We play multi-player and we all get to destroy each other over and over again. We played March Metal Meltdown VI last weekend. Nasty Savage and Prong were in that line-up there. It was great! We will be playing North Star in Philly next weekend. After that we will be in NJ at the Pirates Den – then we are headed to Orlando for the Florida music fest.

Maelstrom: I love the name of the band, how did that come about and how did you guys hook up? (I’ve also heard that you all work with the same company at a straight job too.)

Aaron (guitar): Well, TEOS has been around for millions of years as part of the unrealized sub consciousness of the human collective.

Actually, Adam and I met in high school, and played in some bands together at that time. That was when the unique twin-guitar assault of TEOS began to form, like a new star in a distant nebula. I met Marcus (the first bass player) in college. We were the only two metal fans in our dorm, so we hit if off. I met Steve on a pilgrimage to Mars a few years ago. I gave him some key ideas for his death-bot. That was TEOS 1.0. Eric and I were in a band together a long time ago, but hadn’t been in touch in a while. One night I was at a show and ran into him. The evening ended with him agreeing to come out and jam. Clint and I had been in a band with a guy called Big Drunk Jim. Eventually the evil powers of rock overwhelmed him and we pulled him back from the light and into the arms of TEOS, successfully upgrading to version 1.5, SP1.

Steve, Clint and I all appear to work together, although we secretly work against each other. Eric used to work against us as well, but now he’s a proofreader. Adam doesn’t work, because he’s smarter than the rest of us mindless sheep.

Maelstrom: That’s charming – and the material? How does the material come together? Does someone bring in the riff and you all effortlessly ride the wave to create your fierce powerhouse of a sound?

Steve: It’s always hard to balance the need for nimble communications with the need for all members to have a say. Luckily we are armed with the very latest in communications technology and can exchange ideas quickly, and over a variety of media. It’s important to stay flexible and trust one another.

We write songs in a few different ways, which we feel is the key to having a diverse sound. Each member is free to contribute, and we have a really great pool of talent for new ideas. The most frequent way is that Aaron will show up to practice with an idea of some new frequencies that need smashing. He will typically communicate that nexus of his plans through electromagnetic transducers connected to tensioned wires that enable him to form melodies and chords. The output of the transducers is amplified to staggering extent, and the other band members and subject to sound pressure levels and metallic phrasing that would induce paralysis in most men.

Aaron: Steve’s reaction is typically swift and decisive. He will issue forth in rapid sequence a cornucopia of stupefying phrases on the drum kit, trying to play all the fills so the best ones can be kept. Clint will usually find some common ground between the unalloyed evil of Aarons’ harmonic environment, and the sinister bludgeoning of Steve’s drum kit arrangement. Once this bed of melody and rhythm have sufficiently conjured the dark lord, Adam will find the very best in glaringly dissonant counterpoint to push the boundaries of what can be accomplished in evil harmonic structure. It is then that Eric is ready to take command of the situation. Like the Red Sea, the various musicians subside their frantic onslaught to allow Eric’s heroic voice to urge all metal soldiers to take up arms and fight the good fight.

Maelstrom: You fine young heathens! Sounds like a good recipe for the longevity of the band. So, now that some time has come and gone – how was that gig down in Florida?

Clint: The Florida music fest turned out to be more enjoyable than any of us expected. We kicked it off by driving 15 hours straight, and upon reaching Orlando, immediately set out to party all night. After meeting a bunch of metal fans and promoting for our show the following night, we finally got to sleep after being up for 48 hours.

Friday night we played the main stage, opening for Josh Todd. The stage was awesome – (photo included) a large outdoor setup, complete with stage smoke and balmy Florida weather. We rocked it with reckless abandon, TEOS style, no holds barred. The crowd cheered us on, then bombarded us with compliments. Florida, we’ll be back!

Maelstrom: So what is your dream now and what is on the agenda for the summer? I hear you are going to the Bahamas. A metal monster in a bathing suit? Can it be done?

Clint: For the summer we are trying to jump on some bigger festivals and shows coming through the mid-Atlantic region. We enjoy being on the road. We are also finishing up tracking for our full length CD, which we hope to release this fall. The dream? Well, playing music full time is a dream we are working toward every day. It’s tough, it’s work, it’s not all money, booze and women. It takes dedication and discipline. Fortunately for us, that’s part of who we are. That AND ferocious metal-forging party maniacs.

As for metal heads in bathing suits: as long as the guys avoid speedos and are actually be at the beach (or at least, at the pool), I think it should be fine. Those of us who are pale from keeping vampire hours should remember that sunscreen is our friend.

visit TEOS online and download mp3s at www.teosband.com